How to Prevent Damage and Increase Connection in ABA
I am a Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA). I entered this field with the hope of making a positive difference in the lives of children and families. However, I’ve come to realize that ABA, especially in its traditional forms, has been deeply harmful to folks within the Autistic and PDA communities. For many, ABA is synonymous with coercion, rigid demands, and a lack of respect for individual autonomy—experiences that can lead to lasting trauma rather than growth.
I’m writing this post with the intention of addressing some of the harm in ABA. I don’t claim to have all the answers, but I’m committed to learning, listening, and changing. My hope is to share some insights on preventing further harm and focusing on building genuine connections. I approach this with a deep respect for the Autistic and PDA communities, knowing that there is much more work to be done to make ABA safe, supportive, and truly person-centered.
My experience in ABA began as an undergrad psychology student, working as a behavior technician with Autistic children and following established protocols written by a BCBA focused on behavior change. I was eager to make a difference. Everyone said this was the best, most effective thing: the gold standard. I entered this field with lots of confidence and very little curiosity.
After undergrad, I became a Board Certified Assistant Behavior Analyst (BCaBA). I had the opportunity to work with developmentally disabled adults living in group homes and attending day programs. These 7 years solidified the importance of autonomy, choice, person-centered care, respect, collaboration, flexibility, and trust. I saw firsthand how prioritizing these values fostered genuine connections and empowered the people I was supporting to have more control over their lives and more joy.
Then, I became a BCBA and decided to return to working with children. I was immediately disheartened to find that the values that had guided my practice were consistently missing in pediatric ABA. The focus was largely on compliance, with little regard for the child’s autonomy or psychological safety. The disconnect between the collaborative support plans I had created with adults and the rigid practices in pediatric ABA was troubling, to say the least.
This realization drove me to reassess my approach. Now, I am dedicated to ensuring that autonomy, choice, person-centered care, respect, collaboration, flexibility, and trust are at the core of my practice, whether working with children or adults.
Origins of ABA
ABA is rooted in the work of psychologist B.F. Skinner, who, in the 1960s, emphasized the use of consequences (reinforcement and punishment) to shape behavior (operant conditioning). He demonstrated that reinforcement is a much more effective tool than punishment, and advocated for the use of reinforcement rather than punishment. Early ABA techniques were largely focused on behavior modification, with the goal of reducing "undesirable" behaviors and increasing "desirable" ones using strictly controlled “interventions.” O. Ivar Lovaas is credited with building upon Skinner’s principles. He created the methods most commonly associated with ABA today; ones that incorporated aversive techniques and even physical punishment. While these methods often led to measurable changes in behavior, they were inhumane and frequently prioritized compliance over the person’s autonomy and psychological safety.
Commonly used ABA approaches remain rigid, using coercive techniques or intensive repetition without considering comfort, preferences, or psychological needs. This focus on controlling behavior, rather than understanding and supporting the individual, has led to significant criticism and concern, particularly from the Autistic community, who highlight the potential for harm and the lasting impact of such practices. The focus on controlling behavior rather than understanding and supporting individuals is a major ongoing concern and source of valid criticism in the evolution of ABA practices.
It is ethically dubious to attempt to change someone's behavior in the first place, and even more so when done solely to make them appear more neurotypical. Such efforts can undermine the individual's identity and send a harmful message that their true selves are not acceptable or valued. Behaviors that may seem unusual or different to neurotypical individuals, such as stimming, communicating with gestalts, or having intense interests are often essential to the well-being and self-expression of neurodivergent individuals. Attempting to suppress or modify these behaviors to fit societal norms can lead to significant emotional harm, including feelings of shame, loss of self-worth, and even trauma. Instead of focusing on making someone appear more neurotypical, the goal of anyone supporting Autistics should be to support their autonomy, celebrate their individuality, and create environments where they can thrive as they are. Embracing neurodiversity means recognizing that different ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving are not deficits to be corrected but variations to be respected and valued.
PDAers’ heightened threat response, drive for autonomy, and sense of fairness and equality are often very incompatible with traditional ABA practices. For example, techniques like Discrete Trial Training (DTT) that impose direct, non-negotiable demands or withhold favorite things can increase anxiety and, in turn, resistance. Moreover, long-term exposure to this activated state can be traumatic.
It doesn’t have to be this way.
The practice of drills, contrived reinforcement, and forcing Autistic children to mask is not inherent to the field of ABA. In fact, these methods represent a small niche within the broader field. There are many other tools and practices within ABA that one might not encounter in a typical ABA center.
Consider this. Katelyn is 5 years old. She loves insects, unicorns, and bubble gum. She values autonomy, control, connection, friendship, and humor. Katelyn’s BCBA arrives at her house at 3pm. The BCBA is genuinely happy to see her, and takes genuine interest in her play. The BCBA does not pressure her to change her play or to allow her to join; she uses declarative language to make neutral comments (“I see so many bug specimens!”) and waits to be invited to join. The BCBA looks for opportunities to connect, learn about Katelyn as an individual, and share moments of joy through play. At the same time, the BCBA supports the following goals, developed with Katelyn and her parents:
Katelyn will advocate for her personal boundaries and sensory needs using total communication (spoken, assent withdrawal, resistance) during 80% of opportunities across 1 month.
Katelyn will demonstrate flexibility by practicing acceptance of negative emotions related to up to 1 unexpected loss of autonomy per day across 1 month.
Katelyn’s caregivers will demonstrate acceptance (the ability to encounter and tolerate external stimuli and corresponding private events without judgment) regarding Katelyn’s behavior by verbally demonstrating statements expressing acceptance, with 80% accuracy across 3 consecutive sessions.
Katelyn’s caregivers will demonstrate 3 different defusion strategies to use together with Katelyn with 90% accuracy across 3 consecutive data collections.
The BCBA does this using modeling during role-play and naturally occurring opportunities. Maybe a sibling is being too loud nearby; the BCBA models self-advocacy statements and co-regulates with Katelyn, helping her to develop the skills she needs to advocate in similar situations moving forward. The BCBA gradually starts to wait for Katelyn to try advocating, but always supports her advocacy and advocates for her when needed. The BCBA also models acceptance and mindfulness strategies. When the BCBA makes a mistake in play, she names the mistake and the feelings it brings up. She also names the response she chooses. When Katelyn shows interest, the BCBA explains that doing this helps put space between her feelings and her choices, and that this helps her to make choices that she’s proud of. With no pressure to try this herself, Katelyn continues playing, but absorbs this tool and tries it later on, and it works! Repeated modeling of this creates a culture of acceptance of our own (and other’s) difficult feelings at home. Katelyn begins to let her values take the wheel instead of her drive to avoid her feelings.
Does this sound like ABA?
Well, it is! This session incorporates Acceptance and Commitment Training (ACT) and behavioral skills training, two components of ABA.
It’s easy for an ABA practitioner to say they are practicing child-led, play-based ABA. These terms have become neurodiversity buzzwords, and don’t always indicate an environment free from coercion.
If you’re considering ABA, consider the following elements, and whether they are present in your ABA practitioner or center:
Trauma-Assumed Practice: In ABA, Trauma-Assumed Practice is an approach that operates on the assumption that many (or most) neurodivergent individuals have experienced trauma, impacting their behavior and mental health. It integrates principles of trauma-informed care, emphasizing safety, trust, and understanding by addressing underlying trauma and creating supportive, person-centered interventions. This approach focuses on recognizing and accommodating trauma-related sensitivities to prevent re-traumatization.
What to ask:
Do they know what Trauma-Assumed practice is?
Do they believe that trauma is highly likely for Autistic/neurodivergent/PDA individuals due to the centering of the neurotypical experience in our society?
Assent-Based Practice: Assent is agreement or approval from individuals who are not legally able to provide formal consent, such as children. Assent is about respecting and valuing the individual's preferences and willingness to participate in decisions that affect them. Assent is referenced in the Behavior Analyst Certification Board (BACB) Ethics Code for Behavior Analysts: “Vocal or nonvocal verbal behavior that can be taken to indicate willingness to participate in research or behavioral services by individuals who cannot provide informed consent.” BCBAs are required to obtain assent for treatment, although many do not.
What to ask:
What happens when a child/person says no? What if they turn away from you or push away materials?
How do you know a child/person is on board with an activity? What if they are non-speaking? What happens if they are not on board?
Child-led (or Person-led) sessions: This is an approach that prioritizes the child’s/person’s values, interests, preferences, and pace in all areas of support. It emphasizes creating a supportive and flexible environment where the child/person has a central role in directing their own sessions.
What to ask:
Who decides what will happen in sessions?
What if a child/person wants to do something else?
What do you bring to sessions?
Where do the goals come from?
In addition, consider asking the following questions:
How do you decide how many hours to recommend?
How do you decide what is important to work on? Who writes the goals?
Do you use a tiered model of ABA? If so, what training/credentials do your behavior technicians have?
What self-reflection have you done in your practice? How has your practice changed over time?
How do you address and accommodate any trauma or past negative experiences in your practice?
Can you provide examples of how you adapt your approach based on the child’s/person’s changing needs and preferences?
How do you measure and track progress in a way that aligns with the individual's personal goals and values?
What is your approach to collaboration with other professionals or services involved in an individual's care?
How do you ensure that the interventions are culturally sensitive and tailored to the individual's background and family values? What about neurodivergent culture? Autistic culture?
What kind of ongoing professional development and training do you participate in outside of ABA?
Can you imagine an ABA provider practicing trauma-assumed strategies, honoring assent & autonomy, following truly child-led or person-led practices, building learning opportunities through connection and trust? As we continue to evolve and learn, we should demand that the field of ABA looks beyond simply what is “effective” and truly prioritizes people.
